007 DAYS OF JAMES BOND - Day 7: From Worst to First (Part 3)

007 DAYS OF JAMES BOND

As a seven-part feature, I’ll be counting down the final week to Skyfall’s release in North American theatres on Nov. 9 with seven James Bond-related articles.

DAY 7 – FROM WORST TO FIRST (PART 3)

By Chris Luckett

Some critics bash action movies too much. While movies like Transformers and Wanted do give the genre a bad name, there’s a fine art to crafting a really good action movie. The best ones supersede their preposterousness (or, sometimes, winkingly embrace it) and create an exciting experience with every cinematic piston firing in just the right rhythm.

The Bond series was one of the first to perfect the formula, and the best ones work so well, there’s no question why 007 has become one of the most beloved characters in cinema. The seven best examples:

(Fair warning: major spoilers ahead)

7. From Russia, with Love (1963)

Bond: Sean Connery

Villain: Rosa Klebb (Lotte Lenya)

Maniacal Plot: To get revenge on 007 for foiling Dr. No’s plan, Klebb plans to use a Lektor device and a fake Russian defector to lure Bond to his death.

Verdict: Where Dr. No faltered, From Russia, with Love soars. The second entry in the series is the first to truly show how exciting a story a James Bond adventure can be. Connery feels more at home in the role the second time around, accepting the role as his own. Aided by a script so perfectly structured, it set the template for most of the other Bond movies that came after, From Russia, with Love is a tense thriller of narrow escapes and double-crosses.

Rating: 4.5 / 5

6. Licence to Kill (1989)

Bond: Timothy Dalton

Villain: Franz Sanchez (Robert Davi)

Maniacal Plot: There isn’t one. In a radical change, Licence to Kill is a pure revenge thriller, with Bond going rogue from MI6 and seeking his own justice.

Verdict: Licence to Kill has immensely improved upon time and retrospect. At the time of its release in 1989, it was disliked by many and labelled as too dark and too violent. When you adjust all the Bond movies’ box office numbers for inflation, in fact, Licence to Kill ends up proving to be the lowest-grossing of any 007 picture. The biggest problem was that its brutality and relentless action were too ahead of their time in the late ‘80s. It was a very different toned movie compared to the Roger Moore 007 movies, or even to The Living Daylights, but it’s a spiritual older brother to the Daniel Craig ones. The concept of a villain being hunted by a vendetta-minded James Bond is excellent fodder for a sleek thriller, and Licence to Kill ends up one of the most thrilling of the series.

Rating: 4.5 / 5

5. On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969)

Bond: George Lazenby

Villain: Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Telly Savalas)

Maniacal Plot: Blofeld plans to sterilize the world’s agriculture and food supplies unless he is given international amnesty from his previous criminal plots.

Verdict: It’s easy to think of George Lazenby as the Ringo of Bonds, but his short tenure in 007’s tux is no reflection of his skill in the role, nor of the quality of the movie itself. Lazenby is the equal to early Roger Moore in performance, and has an enjoyable time in the role while still giving it the gravitas it requires – especially in the shocking ending, where Bond experiences true loss and utter despair unexpected in a Bond movie. Telly Savalas gives a vivacious performance as Blofeld, having a blast and letting the character’s arrogance bleed into charm. Delivering great action sequences, fantastic performances, and concluding with the most powerful ending of any Bond film, On Her Majesty’s Secret Service is essential viewing.

4. Goldfinger (1964)

Bond: Sean Connery

Villain: Auric Goldfinger (Gert Frobe)

Maniacal Plot: Goldfinger plans to irradiate all the gold in Fort Knox – save for what he will steal first – thereby driving the price of his own gold up.

Verdict: Goldfinger is undoubtedly the barometer against which any Bond movie is inevitably measured. In a way, that’s understandable, considering it set so many early benchmarks and hallmarks for the series. Not many Bond movies come close to Goldfinger, and although a few have even surpassed it, it’s still considered by a large number to be the best. So many memorable characters (with clever names like Oddjob or Pussy Galore) and quotable lines (“No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!”) add up to a near-perfect movie. It may not still deserve the title of Best Bond Picture after time has treated some parts of it pretty unkindly (“That’s just as bad as listening to the Beatles without earmuffs,” scoffs Bond at one point), but it’s still... well, the gold standard.

Rating: 4.5 / 5

3. Casino Royale (2006)

Bond: Daniel Craig

Villain: Le Chiffre (Mads Mikkelsen)

Maniacal Plot: Le Chiffre, a mathematical genius and banker for terrorists who gambles and unexpectedly loses his clients’ money, plans to win a high-stakes poker game to pay them back and save his life.

Verdict: As beloved as it’s already become, it’s easy to forget that audiences greeted Casino Royale with fangs bared. The casting of the blond Daniel Craig was considered blasphemous by many and some, who had been displeased with the prior Die Another Day, felt they had no need for or interest in James Bond anymore. By taking the series back to its roots, however – and by re-hiring GoldenEye director Martin Campbell to deliver his alchemical formula for action again – the reboot became a massive success and re-invigorated the character in a more drastic way than any previous Bond recasting had managed. Doing away with the tongue-in-cheek winks, the double entendres, the clever names, and even the humourous concept of Q, Casino Royale does feel more heartless and mechanical at times than previous Bond movies – a symptomatic result of its heavy influence by The Bourne Supremacy. By the end, though, the third act’s gut-punch makes Craig’s 007 feel more human than the character ever has, even if he’s not the James Bond we all knew and loved.

Rating: 4.5 / 5

2. The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)

Bond: Roger Moore

Villain: Carl Stromberg (Curd Jurgens)

Maniacal Plot: Having built an underwater lair, Stromberg plans to start a nuclear war and let the world destroy itself, while he creates the perfect society underwater.

Verdict: Any Roger Moore defenders always bring up The Spy who Loved Me, and with fair reason: It is a rare perfect Bond movie. From start to finish it is flawless, using every successful Goldfinger facet, but often slightly improving them. Carl Stromberg, while having a less memorable name than Auric Goldfinger, proves far more dastardly and wicked, with a megalomania that surpasses Blofeld’s. His henchman, Jaws, instantly become one of the most menacing and memorable characters in the whole series. Jetting from Austria to Egypt to Russia and Sardinia and even under the ocean, The Spy who Loved Me is a wild ride that doesn’t let up and has only been topped by one other Bond movie...

Rating: 5 / 5

1. GoldenEye (1995)

Bond: Pierce Brosnan

Villain: Alec Trevelyan/006 (Sean Bean)

Maniacal Plot: Trevelyan, a former 00-agent for MI6, plots to take his revenge by firing an electromagnetic pulse at England’s computers, financial records, banks, and credit card companies, thereby sending the country into chaos and anarchy.

Verdict: James Bond, as a concept, as a character, as a film series, has never been better than in 1995’s GoldenEye. After a six-year absence from screens after 1989’s Licence to Kill and the end of the Cold War, a growing consensus was that James Bond wouldn’t work anymore. Pierce Brosnan’s pitch-perfect balance of Sean Connery’s suave masculinity and Roger Moore’s tongue-in-cheek smirk created a new 007 for a new generation’s sensibility. The movie had fun toying aloud with the theory of Bond outliving his usefulness, from the now-female M calling him a misogynist dinosaur to Trevelyan’s cutting comments to a captive Bond. (“Oh please, James, spare me the Freud! I might as well ask you if all the vodka martinis ever silence the screams of the men you’ve killed. Of if you find forgiveness in the arms of those willing women, for all the dead ones you failed to protect.”) Sean Bean finds the perfect tone for Trevelyan, not pushing the character into maniac territory but instead showing him as the flip side of the coin to James Bond. Indeed, some of the tensest moments of the film result from 006 knowing 007 well enough to anticipate his nearly every move. A wonderful examination of one of the most popular characters of cinema through battling his mirror opposite, GoldenEye reinvented a decades-old formula and remodelled the character and the series for the new millennium. (Plus, a tank smashes up a bunch of stuff!)

Rating: 5/5

007 DAYS OF JAMES BOND - Day 6: From Worst to First (Part 2)

007 DAYS OF JAMES BOND

As a seven-part feature, I’ll be counting down the final week to Skyfall’s release in North American theatres on Nov. 9 with seven James Bond-related articles.

DAY 6 – FROM WORST TO FIRST (PART 2)

By Chris Luckett

For a film series to have been around for five decades and 22 (soon, 23) movies, they have to be doing something right. Despite there being a few missteps over the nearly two dozen Bond pictures, the average movie is quite good. Continuing the countdown from the worst Bond movie to the best, it’s easy to ignore the middle-ranked films. They aren’t as laughably bad as some of the worst and aren’t as classic as some of the best, but the middle-ground Bond movies are still usually better than most action movies. To wit:

(Fair warning: major spoilers ahead)

14. The Living Daylights (1987)

Bond: Timothy Dalton

Villains: Gen. Georgi Koskov (Jeroen Krabbe) & Brad Whitaker (Joe Don Baker)

Maniacal Plot: An American and a Soviet general plan to use swindled arms funds to corner the opium market.

Verdict: The insertion of Timothy Dalton into 007’s tux provided a change of pace from Roger Moore, who had finished his run of playing the secret agent after a robust seven film streak. Dalton’s interpretation of the role was criticized during his tenure as humourless and unemotional, but history has shown it to be ahead of its time in its similarity to Daniel Craig’s performance. Sadly, the lack of humour and fun wouldn’t be as large an issue if the movie was interesting. The overly complicated plot, where almost every character isn’t what they seem and the twists are abundant but not particularly noteworthy, and the bland performances – especially that of Maryan d’Abo, the female lead, who is constantly flip-flopping her allegiance – ultimately keep the movie from being enjoyable, despite some notable stunts.

Rating: 3.5 / 5

13. Octopussy (1983)

Bond: Roger Moore

Villain: Gen. Orlov (Steven Berkoff)

Maniacal Plot: Orlov plans to set off a nuclear bomb at a U.S. Air Force base in West Germany and make it look like an accident, thus leading to European nuclear disarmament and leaving the continent defenceless against a Soviet attack.

Verdict: While history has deemed Octopussy to be one of the more forgettable 007 films, it features some truly impressive action sequences and a more involving plot than it gets credit for. After the horrible Moonraker and the slightly less bad For Your Eyes Only, Octopussy was a return to form for Roger Moore’s Bond. The weakest attributes of the film are the unimpressive characters (although Steven Berkoff does know how to chew the scenery just right). The concept of a Bond film dealing with Faberge eggs and a circus seems incongruous in theory, but Octopussy is one of the more entertaining Bond films of the ‘80s.

Rating: 4 / 5

12. The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)

Bond: Roger Moore

Villain: Francisco Scaramanga (Christopher Lee)

Maniacal Plot: Scaramanga plans to create a devastatingly powerful solar laser and sell it to the highest bidder.

Verdict: After Roger Moore’s inauspicious debut in Live and Let Die, The Man with the Golden Gun proved the series wasn’t abandoning the over-the-top theatrics and fun of the Sean Connery era. Christopher Lee is wonderful as the skilled marksman who spends his spare time duelling and killing the world’s best hitmen using his trademark golden gun. With memorable locations, an excellent theme song by Lulu, and Moore starting to feeling at home in the role, The Man with the Golden Gun is an underrated film that set the stage for the masterpiece to follow, The Spy who Loved Me.

Rating: 4 / 5

11. Die Another Day (2002)

Bond: Pierce Brosnan

Villain: Gustav Graves (Toby Stephens)

Maniacal Plot: Graves plans to use an orbital mirror satellite to create a solar laser capable of clearing the demilitarised zone between North Korea and South Korea, allowing for invasion of the South by the North.

Verdict: The whipping boy of the Bond series is a much better movie than people remember it being. Admittedly, it relied way too much on CGI, resulting in the oft-derided “invisible” car and a sequence where a computer-animated Bond kitesurfs over tidal waves. Still, the sets are impressive (especially Graves’ ice palace, which rivals You Only Live Twice’s hollowed-out volcano and The Spy Who Loved Me’s underwater Atlantis), the action sequences are exciting, and Halle Berry and Rosamund Pike both give performances that rank near the top of the series for female roles. In his fourth and final outing as Bond, Brosnan fit into the role as comfortably as Moore or Connery ever did, delivering double entendres with droll aplomb one moment and duelling in one of the most gripping and intense swordfights of modern cinema the next.

Rating: 4 / 5

10. You Only Live Twice (1967)

Bond: Sean Connery

Villain: Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Donald Pleasance)

Maniacal Plot: Blofeld plans to start World War III by abducting both American and Soviets spacecraft and pitting the two countries against each other.

Verdict: One of the quintessential Connery 007 films and the first to be truly epic in scale, You Only Live Twice is an enjoyable ride with a spectacular climax. After four movies in which Blofeld is never truly shown, he is finally revealed, in all his scarred, Nehru-wearing glory. Everything about the movie was so memorable, it’s possibly lead to more parodies than any other Bond film – from SPECTRE’s base inside a hollowed-out volcano to the memorable appearance of Blofeld (which inspired characters as varied as Dr. Claw from “Inspector Gadget” and the Austin Powers series’ Dr. Evil). An unfortunate section of the film involving making Bond “look again” is quite racist and offensive by today’s standards, but the movie itself still stands as one of the pinnacles of the Connery era and the moment the series realized the gargantuan size of the sandbox it could play in.

Rating: 4 / 5

9. A View to a Kill (1985)

Bond: Roger Moore

Villain: Max Zorin (Christopher Walken)

Maniacal Plot: Zorin plans to destroy Silicon Valley to corner the world market on microchips.

Verdict: Christopher Walken is one of the best actors for A) chewing the scenery and B) seeming creepy and sinister. He seems born to play a Bond villain and, indeed, he’s absolutely perfect in the role. Roger Moore was beginning to seem too old for the part in the prior Octopussy, but he regained some of his youthful vitality for his swan song as 007. Cursed with an irritating and annoying Bond girl in Tanya Roberts but blessed with the greatest henchwoman of the series, A View to a Kill flounders in a few places but ends up being one of the best of the Moore era.

Rating: 4 / 5

8. Tomorrow Never Dies (1997)

Bond: Pierce Brosnan

Villain: Elliot Carver (Jonathan Pryce)

Maniacal Plot: Carver, a cutting-edge media mogul, plots to start a war between the U.K. and China, to profit from the ratings of exclusive broadcast rights.

Verdict: The most underrated Bond movie of the last twenty years, Tomorrow Never Dies is an intense thrill ride with some of the most ambitious action sequences of the four Brosnan movies. Pryce is deliciously slimy as the maniacal would-be war profiteer Carver. Michelle Yeoh provided the first Born girl who was 007’s equal – and treated as such, compared to the light and bemused way Bond movies looked upon female agents in the early movies of the series. Too much product placement and a weak opening song keep the movie from true greatness, but Tomorrow Never Dies is still one of the best action-driven Bond movies.

Rating: 4.5 / 5

007 DAYS OF JAMES BOND WILL RETURN

IN

FROM WORST TO FIRST: PART 3

007 DAYS OF JAMES BOND - Day 5: From Worst to First (Part 1)

007 DAYS OF JAMES BOND

As a seven-part feature, I'll be counting down the final week to Skyfall's release in North American theatres on Nov. 9 with seven James Bond-related articles.

DAY 5 – FROM WORST TO FIRST (PART 1)

By Chris Luckett

We’ve counted down the best title sequences, the best stunts, the best henchmen, and the best deaths of the 007 series, but there’s only one Bond list that people really care about. In the final days before Skyfall hits theatres, it’s time to tackle the Big One: ranking all 22 movies.

It’s been 50 years of 007, from Dr. No to Skyfall. There have been more successes than failures, but that’s not to say there haven’t been a few weak links in the chain. To begin: the weakest...

(Fair warning: major spoilers ahead)

22. Moonraker (1977)

Bond: Roger Moore

Villain: Hugo Drax (Michael Lonsdale)

Maniacal Plot: Drax plans to nuke all life on Earth from his space station, saving just a few “genetically perfect” specimens he’s selected to create a new master race.

Verdict: After the massive success of 1977’s Star Wars, everyone was going gaga for space movies. Having the British secret agent whipping on a spacesuit and flying into zero-gravity reeked of cashing in then and still does. Moonraker does have a number of fantastic set pieces, like the pre-credits skydiving sequence, a frightening cable-car attack high above the forests of Brazil, and a gorgeously filmed death sequence of Drax’s assistant. Unfortunately, the benefits can’t negate all the horrible choices, like bringing Richard Kiel’s Jaws back as a henchman and turning him into a soft romantic who falls for a woman in braided pigtails, or the sheer stupidity of some of the physics. (A hijacked space shuttle taking off from on top of an in-flight airplane?) There have been a few Bond movies almost as bad, but Moonraker is the worst of the worst.

Rating: 1.5 / 5

21. The World is Not Enough (1999)

Bond: Pierce Brosnan

Villains: Renard (Robert Carlyle) and Elektra King (Sophie Marceau)

Maniacal Plot: Renard and his brainwashed partner Elektra (who fell victim to Stockholm Syndrome when Renard kidnapped her as a young girl) plan to cause a nuclear meltdown in the Bosporus Straight, leaving oil companies with no method of transport except Elektra’s oil pipeline.

Verdict: The World is Not Enough has a convoluted plot (see above), convoluted characters (Renard grows stronger every day until death, due to a bullet in his brain), convoluted dangers (helicopters with saw blade apparatuses affixed below them?), and – most convoluted of all – Denise Richards trying to play a nuclear physicist. The movie starts off fantastically, with an intense pre-credits boat chase and one of the best Bond songs, but slowly becomes more ridiculous. By the end, the double entendres are so forced, the film almost feels more Austin Powers than James Bond.

Rating: 2 / 5

20. For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Bond: Roger Moore

Villain: Aris Kristatos (Julian Glover)

Maniacal Plot: The ATAC (Automatic Targeting and Attack Communicator) from a British spy ship is stolen by Kristatos, who plans to sell it to the KGB.

Verdict: Beginning with the lazy disposal of the wheelchair-bound Blofeld character by being dropped down a smokestack, and ending with impressionist Janet Brown playing Margaret Thatcher, For Your Eyes Only has both the worst pre-credits sequence for a Bond movie as well as the worst epilogue. Producers aimed for a more down-to-earth and gritty vibe after the excesses of Moonraker, and there are times it works (like when Bond kicks a car off a cliff, sending a henchman to his plummeting death, and the climactic scenes filmed at the stunning Meteora in Greece). Other times, 54-year-old Moore finds himself fighting off a seductive 22-year-old figure skater, in one of the creepiest scenes of 007’s film career.

Rating: 2.5 / 5

19. Live and Let Die (1973)

Bond: Roger Moore

Villain: Dr. Kananga/Mr. Big (Yaphet Kotto)

Maniacal Plot: Kananga plans to use his chain of Fillet of Soul restaurants for drug trafficking, eventually cornering the world’s heroin market.

Verdict: While Moore’s debut was criticized too harshly at the time for simply not being Sean Connery, Live and Let Die does seem to lack in areas earlier Bond films did not. Busting up a drug ring after murders in Harlem and New Orleans is more a job for the DEA than MI6. Set amidst the blaxploitation movement of the early ‘70s, the movie also skirts dangerously close to racism at times (although it evens out the stereotypes by featuring a brashly loud and irritating Louisianan sheriff played by Clifton James). It also involves voodoo and tries to shoehorn supernatural elements into 007’s universe, which never truly works. Still, it does have one of the greatest Bond themes, courtesy of Paul McCartney & Wings.

Rating: 2.5 / 5

18. Dr. No (1962)

Bond: Sean Connery

Villain: Dr. Julius No (Joseph Wiseman)

Maniacal Plot: Scientist No, bitter after defecting from China and finding his skills unwanted by both Americans and Soviets, plans to foil an American space launch with a radio beam.

Verdict: This is where it all began. The music was there from the get-go, as were most of the formulas, catchphrases, and characters. Connery did an admirable job inhabiting Ian Fleming’s spy, though Fleming himself called the movie “dreadful.” Dr. No is an interesting villain, his hands lost to radiation exposure and replaced with steel ones, but Wiseman isn’t given much to work with beyond that. More important for historical significance, Dr. No was less a good movie than a good practice round before the excellent From Russia, with Love and Goldfinger.

Rating: 2.5 / 5

17. Quantum of Solace (2008)

Bond: Daniel Craig

Villain: Dominic Greene (Mathieu Amalric)

Maniacal Plot: Greene plans to corner Bolivia’s water supply.

Verdict: The “J.B.” leading the charge in Quantum of Solace might just as well have been Jason Bourne, he bears so little resemblance to James Bond. Craig struggles to keep Bond a human figure, while the script seems to be written with the depth of shampoo instructions: Go to an exotic country, interrogate someone, fight them, run, repeat. Between jaunting to Bolivia, Haiti, Austria, England, Russia, and Italy, Bond barely has time to crack a smirk, let alone taste a martini. The only true sequel in the Bond canon – it picks up immediately after the end of Casino Royale – the wonderful title and the gorgeous sets ultimately aren’t enough to make up for the frantic editing, forgettable opening song, and bland plot.

Rating: 3 / 5

16. Diamonds are Forever (1971)

Bond: Sean Connery

Villain: Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Charles Gray)

Maniacal Plot: Blofeld has been stealing South African diamonds to create a laser satellite and plans to use it to destroy world powers’ nuclear supplies and auction global nuclear supremacy to the highest bidder.

Verdict: After George Lazenby was passed on for a return in the tux (or turned it down, depending on the story), Connery was lured back. The results are mixed. Setting the movie mostly in Las Vegas provides a number of excellent set pieces, such as Bond being buried in an underground pipeline and later thrillingly scaling the outside of a casino. There are also many unfortunate disappointments, like Connery randomly wrestling two lithe henchwomen in a pool and the way henchmen Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd’s implied homosexuality is treated with creepy derision and comicality. Underrated yet disappointing, Diamonds are Forever is good, but takes one step back for every step forward.

Rating: 3.5 / 5

15. Thunderball (1965)

Bond: Sean Connery

Villain: Emilio Largo (Adolfo Celi)

Maniacal Plot: Largo plans to hijack a NATO bomber, steal its warheads, and extort 100 million pounds from the British and American governments.

Verdict: Goldfinger’s success led to too much of a good thing, with Thunderball feeling bloated at 130 minutes and featuring a lot of aquatic repetition. The plot itself is one of the best of the early Bond films and Largo is a memorable villain. Too much, though, just feels reheated in new settings. Connery would prove the formula wasn’t dead with the follow-up You Only Live Twice, but it begins appearing worn out here. Iconic scenes such as the underwater spear gun battle work better in memory than they do watching them now. Thunderball is good for what it is, but feels too much like it’s trying to recreate the best attributes of the first few films.

Rating: 3.5 / 5

007 DAYS OF JAMES BOND WITH RETURN

IN

FROM WORST TO FIRST: PART 2