By Chris Luckett
0 stars out of 5
Image property of Universal Pictures |
Riddick has much in common with another recent movie: the Tom
Cruise-starring Oblivion. Both are
sci-fi movies without a single original thought, which steal liberally from
other movies. The main difference between the two is that Oblivion, for all its unoriginality, was one of the most visually
spectacular movies of 2013. Riddick,
on the other hand, has directing, acting, and visual effects as weak as its
writing.
If you’ve never seen Aliens, the Jurassic Park trilogy, the Lord of the Rings
trilogy, Flash Gordon, Robinson Crusoe on Mars, The Lion King, Jason X, The Road Warrior, Predators,
1999’s The Mummy, Starship Troopers, or Pitch Black, you’ll likely find Riddick an inventive and thrilling piece
of cinema. The more of those you’ve seen, though, the less there is to
appreciate here.
Image property of Universal Pictures |
The character of Richard B. Riddick
originated in 2000’s Pitch Black, in
which the arrested Riddick crash-landed with his captors on a hostile planet
and survived being hunted by aliens using his memorable night-vision eyes. It
wasn’t the best thriller of the year, but it was an entertaining enough thrill
ride that launched Diesel’s career. The 2004 sequel, The Chronicles of Riddick, was more bloated, less original, and an outright
worse movie. Riddick marks the lowest
point yet for the series.
The plot involves Riddick being stranded
alone on a foreign planet and struggling to survive with his alien-hyena pet.
No, wait, it’s about duelling teams of mercenaries hunting him down. Scratch
that, it’s a survival story of a small group of people battling a horde of
swarming aliens. Riddick’s story is unbelievably
aimless and completely unsure of what it wants to be, which is symptomatic of
its quilt-work writing.
Image property of Universal Pictures |
There were two other people sitting in the
theatre where I saw Riddick, and they
spent the second half of the movie mocking it mercilessly. Their commentary
proved infinitely more entertaining than the movie itself. “This is probably
the worst movie of all time,” one of them muttered at one point. It may not be that
bad, but Riddick just might be the
worst movie of the year.
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